Without Meaning

Far from everything lies a sin
Untouchable but I can see
Here I only find a pain deep within
It's how should be

Through the days they said me to stay here
Being fed slowly by my fears
My name should be whispered for another century
My words will be writen as a prophecy
Beyond the limit of the truth that lives inside everyone
They made me bleed to spread a fake lesson

Why is everything so empty?
They can't stand the guilty
So I'm here to be blamed in vain
I must be stronger to be free again

Far from us all they hide a secret
Where the sky turns to scarlet
I used to rest my head there every day
Before the innocence went away

They made us know the temptation
And then we poisoned our own creation
If you believe in destiny you follow me
And succumb to everything thet they want you to see

With them my words don't have a meaning
You can't feel my pain but you can see me bleeding

Days Of Agony

Do you think you can write my reality?

I left it all behind to fill myself with their pain
But I let a stranger dry my tears
I feel safe but the agony still remains
But the price will pay all this wasted years

Do you think you can remind me just once again?
All of my memories that you cannot put on a grave
I had to sacrifice the dreams but I hope it wasn't in vain
An artificially way of life but I couldn't be another slave

Who is the real victim of the fate?
A stranger have crossed my way
They are already gone but it's never is too late
I still need to open my eyes everyday

A pain will come to burn my innocence
No regrets and no one to blame
Just face the beginning of decadence
A life full of sins but no shame

In my days of agony
I dream about a fantasy
A stranger who whispers to me:
“You are not what you're supposed to be”

But I'm free..

Another Night To Sleep

My dear friend
The past is not your forgiveness
My enemy
Our fight is just beginning

Loneliness just give me another way to fall
There isn't what to fear
But I still feel the cold here

Take me by the hand and carry me
Through the Gate of Horn
Let the brothers show my destiny
What is written since I was born?

Knowing the future doesn't change my present
My path is still a desert
There's nothing to lead my will
Nowhere to run, nothing to hide

The desire was poisoned by the reality
And killed the hope in another fantasy
But I still have another night to sleep

Take me by the hand and carry me
Through the Gate of Ivory
Let the brothers play with me
It's better than face the enemy

I guess that being blind I will never need to be free
These chains are so stronger I guess it fits in me

Take me by the hand and carry me
Away from my insanity
Make my dream end here
Where the brothers can't see

But I will always have another night to sleep

Waiting To Die

The letter writen with my blood
The story is already told
I lost myself in a dream
And it will never carry me to home

Sometimes I just wonder
Why am I still here?
I just wish I could be stronger
To wait for what I fear

The same fight through the years
But there's nothing to earn
I only have created
The emptiness in my heart

So I'm waiting to die
And the pain will be a memorie
Another day could be too late
And unleash all my sins

And I still wonder
Why Am I breathing?
I wish I could be stronger
To wait my destiny

And it hurts me to know
That I can't end it by myself
While I can't take it any longer
I'm frozen in this hell

So I waiting to die
I wait my time to lie
Tomorrow is too late
Who will close my eyes?

One Of Us

We are the creation you cannot control
We are victims of the justice and the law
You surrender and wait for something to follow

You are one of us

We sold our conscience
We manipulate the fate
You are just another experience

Silence is the key
You cannot know
You cannot see

We are the future
You are the next sin
We are artificially pure
You are what you carry within

You are the subliminal message

We are the soldiers of the last day
You are the last light to fade away
We are the road to the hell
Today the rebel angel fell

The same old values
Offer on a silver plate
You are one of us
And you can't escape

We are the voice you hear in you mind
You know that someday it will happen
We are the feeling that made you blind

You are one of us
Don't be afraid
You are on of us
Forever empty

The Last Tale

Silence
Where is my soul?
So broken inside
This is the last tale I'll tell

Once I wished to be here
I had a reason to believe
But then everything
Turned into dust
And I'm living a lie

With the ashes of my dreams in my hands
I left behind a place 'cause my soul wasn't there
And in the last day I have prayed to fall
I became empty and I broke all the walls

I walked alone but my memories were there
Until the day I saw it was in vain
The pain will be here and a new wound will come
Just to remind me of the things I have done

Silence
Can I bleed again?
This blade seems so sweet
But I don't know if it is real

Once I wished but now I see
The rope is not strong enough
To support my body
It's fall or die
I can't live tonight

With the ashes of my dreams in my hands
I cried as I never did it before
And in the first day I prayed to be free
So I burned my dreams one more time

I walked alone in a road to nowhere
And I waited for the day when it would start again
It will never have an end so this is the last tale I'll tell
'Cause I'm trapped here in the cage of destiny

The Dreamer And The Pain

I- My Decay

Don't look at me
Just leave me alone

I cannot stand it
Not this time
Cause I find myself lost in a illusion

I tried to think I could be ok
But I know
I'm forever trapped in my dreams


II- The Road I'll Choose

Gimme my wings
I'm moving on
It's getting late
I can't stay strong
Forget the future
Enjoy the past
The old issue
What I feel still rest

Searching for freedom everyday
Emancipation, I need to feel safe

Lost inside I burried my lies
I have time to open my eyes
But I feel so cold
So good
So dead
And this road I'll choose

Time to come back in time
Forsake the things
Your legacy is mine

Another night
The same pain
It doesn't matter
I'm running away
Another place
In loneliness
I have been guide
Through the voices in my head

I found my freedom here
And it is all that I fear

Lost inside I burried my lies
I have time to open my eyes
But I feel so cold
So good
So dead
And this road I'll choose


III- Dead

Silence
Can you still hear me?
Darkness
Can I still see you ?

I have been waiting for so long time
But today I will take my last breath
No hope
No light
Just the end

I don't want to cry in my last day

I will never be right
So now it's time to burn the way
No choices
No dreams
Just the pain

Silence
The same tear still runs inside of me
Trying to find a way to come back
Denying
Lying

The only way is dying


IV- The Pain

I still can feel the pain
Dead or alive it's here
And when I try to heal it
I only feel it getting worse
There is no forgiveness to the ones who lost their souls

Everyday facing the destiny
I wait in silence
Condemned by my own guilty
My weakness made me confess
And leave the dream behind

Loneliness
I'm free but the world is still a cage

( 09/07/2009 >>> 15/09/2009)

Destroy Your Way

Forgetting the name
Giving a chance to the pain
The time will be wasted
Until my dying day

The truth in my hands
A legacy forgotten
The unspoken words
It will be better than nothing

Destroy your way
So they won't follow you

Denying my fears
Just another day to live
Forgive my sins
But I won't change anything

The guilty will be there
Just another thing to carry
One last dream
And I will face my death

Destroy your way
So they won't follow you

Closing another door...

Come Again

Come hurt me again
'Cause I cannot think you are different anymore
Come lie to me again
You won't be the first to drive me insane

You are just another one
But I used to believe in you
One more time
I let you blind me

Come betray me again
I'll always find a way to know the truth
Come kill me again
'Cause I cannot do it by myself

'Cause in the end
It's just the same
Forget who you are
We will always be liars

Come dream with me again
Let's see who will fall first
Come love me again
'Cause I'm tired of your fears

I will follow the signs
So don't try to hide the evidences
You are just like me
We fake to live

Come hate me again
I think that is all you need
Come make me bleed again
'Cause I can't stand the pain

Come again
I'm waiting
One more time
I cannot die, but I can lie



PS: Vee, obrigada pela correção ^^

Son Of The 7th Month

Son of the 7th month
You can betray them all
But you will never betray me
'Cause I will kill you before it

Son of the emperor
You can't control me
I see through your eyes
You can't lie to me

As if I know the future
I build my own grave
And I only wait my time to lie
I will close my eyes while I'm in time

Son of the 7th month
Born with the moon
I know everything about you
And I'm planning to use you

Son of the chaos
You will fall even if I have to fall with you

As if I know the future
I build my own grave
And I only wait my time to lie
I will close my eyes while I'm in time

“And the river will never flow again but my blood will remain there staining the water, just making me remember that the pain will never be gone and you were just another one who came to show me. And the next will show me the same thing. The tale will repeat forever.”

Son of the 7th month...
Bring me back to my death
Take everything that I have
But I promise that I will steal it back

Shadows Of Past

I ever knew our ways would be
Separated by the destiny
I always knew

But I started to believe
The things are just how they should be
I will always bleed

Time passed us by
And I can't even cry

'Cause this hand just has taken me
And wrote ours fates
Put the cross on our graves
I don't believe you can save me
Here

I know I'm better all alone
I guess I'll never find my home
You are never gone

The shadows of past
Watching me
Showing what we never will could be

Time passed us by
And I can't even die

'Cause this hand just has taken me
And wrote ours fates
Put the cross on our graves
I don't believe you can save me
Here

'Cause this hand just has taken me
And wrote ours fates
Put the cross on our graves
I don't believe you can save me
Here

Time passed us by
And I can't live a lie

'Cause this hand just has taken me
And wrote ours fates
Put the cross on our graves
I don't believe you can save me
Here

My Sweet Prophecy

Play with me
My sweet prophecy
Destroy my dreams
Hear my screams

Play with me
Don't let me breathe
Give me one more night
While I still have a reason to fight

The first thing they tell me
The future that they unveiled
I will follow you
How they said I will do

Can I choose?
Can I be on the other side?
Can I lose?
Can I find a place to hide?

Play with me
My sweet prophecy
Destroy my dreams
Hear my screams

When the time came
You tried to find someone to blame
And if I couldn't be here
You couldn't chose me

There is a curse hunting me
It's hard to believe that I belong to this destiny
But when all the doors are closed
And all the wounds were opened
I just wait and stand
The day when the death will take me by the hand

Play with me
Don't let me breathe
Give me one more night
While I still have a reason to fight

Every step was written before today
It reveals itself everytime I lie
And when I want to see
It shows me who I will never be

Can I write the next page?
Can I believe in what I see in my dreams?
Can I live knowing that I will become all that I hate?
Can I wake up and see that the things are what they seems?

Play with me
My sweet prophecy
Give me what I need
Don't let me bleed

Play with me
My sweet prophecy
Please kill me
Before my heart freezes

Everything That I Once Lost

Sometimes I wonder if I could find some truth in my words
'Cause everyday I lose something in this cold world
I chose to live without all the things that could make me feel good
But they still come to hunt me as I ever knew they would

For everything that I once lost
I find myself bleeding inside
For everything that I need most
I wish I could be blind

Sometimes I wonder if I could live all my life with this lie
'Cause everyday the pain makes me want to die
And I will be falling again before I have a chance to say
How many times I wished to have a place where I could stay

For everything that I once lost
I find myself bleeding inside
For everything that I need most
I wish I could be blind

Sometimes I wonder if all this fight will be in vain
'Cause I don't know if I will be strong enough to try again
But I know that I will never be ready to face the things that will come
And don't matter how hard I will try, the pain is the only thing that will never be gone

For everything that I once lost
I find myself bleeding inside
For everything that I need most
I wish I could be blind

Sometimes I wonder if I will always be alone
'Cause I'm tired of always be the one
Who will believe and bleed
And never have what I need

For everything that I once lost
I find myself bleeding inside
For everything that I need most
I wish I could be blind

When You Lie In The Dragon's Mouth

It will happen, today or tomorrow
I will die in sorrow
So I anticipate the pain
I try to get stronger, but it is all in vain

They are around you
Taking a piece everyday
They won't forget you
They will make you walk in their way

Dragons fly
They only wait your dreams die
One day you won't deny
You will surrender to the lie

It's all you ever wanted
So go ahead while you are in time
It's all you waited all your life
So just forsake me if I die

They are coming again
With promises to end your pain
They built a world for you to escape
But once you enter there you will never be safe

Dragons are dressed in white
But they keep being wild
I pray for you to see it
Before you go to sleep

When you lie in the dragon's mouth
There's nothing I can do about it
I just wish this could be my last night
I just hope your instincts could be right

When you lie in the dragon's mouth
There's no fear in your eyes
But I can see the light going out
You woke up in the dragon's mouth

You chose to live in the dragon's mouth...

The Hunter

One shoot

I want to feel the taste of your blood in my mouth
I want to be the reason for your pain
I will show you how to get insane

I need to kill you to keep you here
I need to write my name on your skin
I'll never set you free my prince

You are so fragile when you try to be strong
What you gonna do when I torture you ?
'Cause I'll never let you go

I'm the hunter and you are my target
I need to have you on my knees
To make the fairy tale complete

One shoot and....

Get yours, 'cause I'm getting mine

My Cage Of Lies

Everytime you come to free me
I let them caught me again
That's the reason why you will ever see my pain
That's the reason why you will never see me cry

I love this cage

Freedom is like love
Don't matter how much you have
'Cause it's never enough
That's why I hide myself here

I need to feel safe

The more we grow up
The more we get untrue
Everyday we need to tell a new lie
This is the meaning of life

The lie will never die

In my cage I'm safe
My pain protects me against everything
I don't want to feel nor to see
I just have to lie...

Locked I'll be free

I'm addicted to this pain
And all the things that it can change
I'm not afraid to lie but I'm afraid to die
Without know the truth

The agony of have something behind it all

I can stop these things
But a new beginning will happen
And I will need to face
All the pain that I don't want feel anymore

I threw away the key

Too Late

It's too late to change my mind
I feel the anger growing deep inside
I don't need to breathe

It's too late to come back
To live in agony is a pride
I don't need to believe

Thinking in my past I search for some place to rest

Every place is better when you are alone
Every heart is better when all the feelings are gone

It's too late to lie
I will never have a chance to try
I don't need to lose

I never will be free while I keep dreaming every night

It's too late to stop this goodbye
The memories will keep you by my side
I don't need you here anymore

Every night is better when you are awake
Every mistake you commited is better than the next you will make

I don't want to run away but I need to escape
From all of the things
That used to be my dreams
And now hunt me
Follow me
Steal my peace
Reveal the truth
How many times I will need to tell myself
That I don't need to dream?

Every lie is better when you believe in it

It's too late do die
'Cause I found my cure

Nothing Left

Save your life
Killing me
Paradise
Is not here

Let the prophecy
Becomes true
All this fight
Won't save you

Desire won't burn in my eyes again
Everything I am, I destroyed
I became so strong being insane
Everything is a part of the game

I'm feeling empty in this cage
Not even myself I can hate

Find the truth between the lies
The reason why everything dies

Save your life
Killing me
Paradise
Is not here

Let the prophecy
Becomes true
All this fight
Won't save you

Everything is back
But it's not the same
I don't want
Someone else to blame

Kill me 'cause dead I'm alive
Hear the silence inside your mind
Try to feel what I feel
Just once in my life I chose to be blind
All the things that only the pain can heal

I cannot forget why I'm here
Flirting with my fear

They whisper to me
What I don't need to see
Torturing me while I sleep
This wound never hurt me so deep

Save your life
Killing me
Paradise
Is not here

Let the prophecy
Becomes true
All this fight
Won't save you

This is when the fates collide
Let me see what you have inside
And if you are waiting to see what I have
I'm sorry but nothing left





Ps: A volta ao contrário da ida, dispensa toda e qualquer explicação ^^

Eu me acostumei a ser muito precisa, tanto com horários assim como datas, sempre gostei de números exatos...

E hoje, ao completar um ano postando aqui... decido encerrar isso aqui (só o tempo dirá se esta é uma medida provisória ou não)

Sim, estou me aposentando das palavras... o que não significa porém que de vez em quando eu não recorra à elas, mas farei isso o mínimo possível, uma vez que não há mais nada que eu ainda precise dizer...

Simples assim, deixo isso tudo no mesmo lugar aonde começou...

Welcome To Illusia

Comentários: Bom, na verdade esse é um poema inacabado ... e assim vai permanecer, porque hoje eu não vejo mais sentido para as palavras que nele foram escritas... espero que ainda assim tenha se tornado algo bom, pois durante quase uma semana depositei minhas esperanças na sua grandiosidade... algo que infelizmente não saiu como planejado.


Welcome To Illusia

I spent a long time being who I am
Now it's time to fake
Illusion
Destruction

Once I dreamed wishing I could change the things
Now I keep waiting but without a hope, I cut my wings
Blinding memories
Denying reality

I tried to live my life but I just found pain
Every step I take I get more insane
Do you really know me or you just play the game?
So why does the last piece remains?

Do you believe in everything you see?
How can you say it's not a fantasy?
Heart against mind in a eternal fight
Can you find the light?

Welcome to Illusia
A place where you can buy your dreams
Welcome to Illusia
A place where nothing is what seems

My silence was the worst lie I could have told you
Now I spend my life thinking in what I won't do
But they never will forbid me to lay my head
And dream with all that I can't have

Dreams Are The Best Torture

Why is so easy to believe in what your eyes cannot see but you always find while you are sleeping?

The day that I read those verses
I knew that everything was just beginning
And it won't stop so early

'Cause it's just the pain that keeps watching me sleeping
Stealing my dreams to makes me feel like a sinner

I wish I could understand everything that I cannot know
But I keep waiting... I will always be here in the same place
Don't matter how much I cry
'Cause nobody can see my eyes
Don't matter how much I love
'Cause I don't have a heart

Dreams are the best torture
Don't matter what you do
They will always live in you
And the foolish hope will always be a light through the darkness
A light that turns off everytime you open your eyes

'Cause it's just the pain that keeps watching me sleeping
Stealing my dreams to makes me feel like a sinner

I guess I lost my last chance
But it never was real
So I just need torture myself one more time
But I don't know if I want to wake up again

Dreams are the best torture
Don't matter what you do
They will always live in you
And the foolish hope will always be a light through the darkness
A light that turns off everytime you open your eyes

Why I still believe?
Another light turned off...

Eternity (365)

I can't feel anything
I'm the only one to blame
I don't wanna breathe
I'm just waiting in my shadows

Eternity
So cruel
A fantasy
So true

I don't know if I must believe in everything that keeps me alive

365 tears that I never cried
I wished I had strength to choose other way
I ever knew that I should live lost in a lie
I never will be ready

Eternity
So cruel
Insanity
So true

I don't know if I must believe in what I read

I locked myself in this dream
Now it's time to wake up
What I dreamed will be the only truth for me?
Or will I die when I open my eyes?

Eternity
So cruel
Reality
So cruel

I don't know if I must believe in myself
I don't know if I must believe in dreams
I don't know if I must believe in the future
I don't know if I must believe in destiny
I don't know if I must believe...

Letargia

Meus olhos já não podem enxergar mais nada
O sangue escorre pelos meus pulsos
Tudo fica cada vez mais frio
Nem mesmo esta corda no meu pescoço é capaz de suportar o peso dos meus pecados
Eu despenco, rumo ao abismo sem fim
Aonde meus erros vem e me pegam pela mão
Conduzindo-me ao meu último suspiro
Então eu permito levarem meu coração em uma estaca
E deixo minha alma sucumbir aos meus medos
Meu corpo agoniza febril em sua sepultura
Uma última e desesperada chance de reaver minha alma
Meus pecados me atormentam novamente
Desencadeando minhas memórias
Revelando tudo o que eu perdi
Meus sonhos evaporam junto com o pouco que restou de minha inocência
Em vão eu tento segurar sua fumaça com minhas mãos
A dor continua presente ainda que eu não possa sentí-la
Meus pensamentos ecoam no silêncio
As correntes me mantêm ligada às raízes do meu sofrimento
Impedindo que eu possa adiar o fim
Eu posso sentí-lo cada vez mais perto
Me torturando lentamente ao dar-me a plena consciência de meus atos
Mostrando minha fraqueza perante o destino
Os fantasmas do passado voltam um a um para destruir o que seria deixado por mim
Tudo à minha volta desmorona enquanto eu me afogo no meu próprio sangue
Não sou poupada nem ao menos de assistir meu próprio fim
Minha alma debate-se, eu grito na tentativa de ainda ser ouvida
Mas mais uma vez o silêncio me cala
Uma última lágrima ainda escorre pelo meu rosto
Até encontrar-se com o sangue que continua a fluir pelos meus poros
Não há nada mais a fazer a não ser entregar-me
O pouco de energia que eu ainda possuo esvai-se rapidamente
E finalmente tudo é deixado para trás

And I Don't Even Know

Silent whisper that I cannot understand
You bring me the pain
But I'd give my life to hold your hand
Everything in this life is in vain

And I don't even know
The secret that I hide so well
And I don't even know
How many times I fell

I cannot die
But I cannot live anymore
I'm tired of this lie
How can a word hurt me?
Making me remember what I shoul be
It seems that I'm playing with my bruises
And torturing myself thinking in what I can lose
But I'm blind to see the truth
I cannot lose what I will never have

And I don't even know
The secret that I hide so well
And I don't even know
How many times I fell

Alone as ever
Empty
Guilty
Weak
Freak
Coward!!!
This is what I chose to be
Can you see the agony in me?

And I don't even know
The reason why I keep reading
And I don't even know
The reason why I keep bleeding

The Secret Of My Destiny (Between The Right And The Wrong)

Comentários: Aonde foi parar minha obscuridade? Se alguem achar por favor entrar em contato!


The Secret Of My Destiny (Between The Right And The Wrong)

It's almost midnight
And you are still here
I feel you presence
There's nothing I fear
The truth isn't real
It won't happen
But it keeps so near
I want to try it
In my dreams

It's getting closer
Maybe next life
I could wait
And it just feel right

I know much more than you
I kept it secret
Untill your lies became the truth
I want to read your mind
I want to you to recognize
All the ways
That lead you to the dark
I can't control it
It's more than I expect
It's just the destiny
Screaming in my head

It's getting closer
Maybe next life
I could wait
And it just feel right

The time is passing
But I never will run
Desires
I can't forget what I've done
It's just a fantasy
Playing with the reality
A nightmare
In my sweet insanity

It's getting closer
Maybe next life
I could wait
And it just feel right

I know somethings
Between the right and wrong
I do nothing
How can I be so strong?
I stoped the search
Why do you still hide?
My heart has nothing inside
But all the secrets
I keep locked in my mind

Vendo os dias passarem

Ok... todos sabem dos meus períodos improdutivos e esse é mais um.
A grande diferença é que eu nunca busquei explicá-los, nunca tentei mostrar o que se passa na minha mente em um momento como esse.Bom, dizem que pra tudo se tem uma primeira vez...

Enfim, o que pode ser tão grande ao ponto de me fazer parar (por enquanto temporariamente) de escrever? A resposta é bem simples: a ausência do elemento mais essencial, o sentimento.
Sem amor, sem dor, sem ódio, sem tristeza, sem felicidade, sem angústia, e estranhamente eu estou bem na pele desse ser inanimado ...
Equilíbrio, isso poderia ser uma boa resposta para toda essa minha passividade...Quando dois fatores se equilibram, eles automaticamente se anulam, e é assim que eu me sinto.

Anestesiada, e ao fim de cada dose, quando começo a recobrar meus sentidos, novamente meu corpo dispara algo que deixa novamente nessa embriaguez passiva. Ao ponto de eu estar escrevendo estas palavras pela própria racionalidade...
Mas, o cantrário do racional não estaria no emocional? Se existe esse tal equilíbrio, por que o racional teima em aparecer?
Na verdade existe um terceiro fator perdido aí no meio: o instinto
Enquanto todo meu lado emocional jaz a sete palmos, o meu instinto tráz à tona meu lado racional. A falsa idéia de substituição que só deixa um buraco dentro de mim...

Eu sei que o que realmente importava permanece dentro de mim, aprisionado em um canto, desfrutando da passividade, tendo permissão para viver, mas não tendo como se alimentar, se submetendo à toda frieza que hoje teima em me habitar.

Talvez eu devesse chamar isso de Síndrome do tanto faz... afinal de contas, essa seria a resposta para qualquer coisa que me perguntassem nesse exato momento.

E talvez o sintoma mais expressivo esteja ligado ao fato de não haver nada que eu deseje neste instante. NADA! absolutamente NADA!

E o que me mantém viva? O acaso? O destino? Estou apenas deixando que eles ajam, seguindo as leis naturais...

Mas, seguir as leis naturais também não implicaria em sentir?

E eu nem ao menos desejo jogar essa racionalidade toda pelo cano!

Como pode estar tudo certo estando tudo errado?
Aliás, está mesmo certo? Como eu posso saber se não sinto.

Estaria eu destruída? Eu não tenho uma resposta.

As coisas que eu não sei são exatamente as quais eu compreendo

Aonde eu me abandonei?

Eu nem ao menos desejo saber esta resposta, nem esta, nem nenhuma outra...

E assim eu vejo os dias passarem por mim...

Torture

Comentários: O que eu escrevi nestas linhas foi exatamente o que eu comecei a sentir enquanto lia mais uma dessas historinhas bonitinhas que se publicam em sites, ao mesmo tempo em que eu ouvia umas trilhas sonoras de uns filmes. Se alguém tivesse assistido a cena chamaria de louca... e essa pessoa estaria certa. O motivo disso ficará claro nas linhas a seguir.


Torture

What keeps me alive?
Pain, agony, desire
Torture!

I need to listen
I need to read
All the things that can't be real for me
I need to bleed
I need to sufocate myself

Only falling I can breathe
Only broken I feel complete

Everything that is evil seduces me
And I love when I see it in my eyes
I need to have something to hurt me
I need to feel the reality burning in my skin
Cause I cannot live a lie

Only pain inside
There isn't a better place to hide it

What keeps me alive?
Pain, agony, desire
Torture!

The pain unleash my memories
And I just waste all my time in a moment
Hauting me until I give it sentencies
And the guilty just makes me feel stronger

Only falling I can breathe
Only broken I feel complete

The agony frees my thoughts
Every step I take the angry grows
The insanity controls my mind
I'm dying but it happens so slow

Only pain inside
There isn't a better place to hide it

The desire makes me search in all the corners
For somethings that I really don't know what they are
But I only can have when I close my eyes
And then I force myself to write it in a line

What keeps me alive?
Pain, agony, desire

The torture makes me live
What kind of pain will come?
How much can I stand my ground?
I need to know this answer

Only with the suffering I can dream
Cause I'll be ready when the time come
And I'll be stronger enough to fight

What keeps me alive?
Pain, agony, desire
Torture!

Silent Dreamers Are The Next Sinners

Comentários: Sempre abominei poesias/músicas que tem várias partes, estilo The Poet And The Pendulum do Nightwish (a qual eu teria cortado pela metade e para mim já estaria ótima), mas eu sempre pago minha língua, e em tempos de megalomania, acabei por escrever algo exatamente nestes moldes... será que o Tuomas Holopainen baixou em mim ? (queria eu =P)
Enfim, isso é tudo...


Silent Dreamers Are The Next Sinners

I- To Make It Real

One by one
I will kill
They need to be dead
To make it real

Silent dreamers are the next sinners

Ilusions never come from your mind
Without the other people it's one thing you will never find
Kill them all, make them fall
They can't control this feeling inside of you
Don't let them steal the freedom that lies inside of you

One by one
I will kill
They need to be dead
To make it real

II- Doubts

Can my soul die while my body is still living?
Every line I wrote I feel the pen geting heavier
What is growing inside of me?
All the things that I never wish to have

Silent dreamers are the next sinners

Could I find my light in the farthest place?
Can I keep wanting change everything or should I let everything changes me?
The arrogance brings me the agony
For how long will I think that everything is only in my hands?

III- I Could Not Feel

Let me run while I have time
I need to save me from myself
I could not feel the pain anymore
I could not feel the guilty saying me to go home

Where are everything?
I'm in the end of the road
I have no future
But can I turn back and relive the past?

Silent dreamers are the next sinners

IV- The Mistake

How could I think that the past can replace the future?
Will I ever destroy everything around me?
I must try to say I'm sorry but I really don't feel it
You need to choose someone to blame
They choose to blame it on me

I'm the next on the line
I walk standing my sins
I see they with all that one day were mine
This is the price to pay when you lose your dreams
Just one thing could be worst
Show your dreams to the world
And they will become your worst enemy

Silent dreamers are the next sinners

V-Instincts

I can sniff them
I will manipulate them
And play with their ropes
I want to steal all their hopes
Like one day they did to me
I will follow my instincts
I don't want to be cruel
But it controls me
I can feel it everytime I do something
I carry this guilty, but it just makes me stronger
My eyes show the disillusion
But I'm just following my wildest instincts
I want to make them fall
They need to be dead to make it real
I'm a silent dreamer, and I know that is comming the time to be a sinner

A Inocência dos Insanos

Chegou a hora de eu me criar
Domar-me com olhos de crueldade
Conviver com o meu pior
Para somente assim conseguir ser melhor
Eu não terei que abrir outra ferida
Enquanto esta ainda sangrar o suficiente para alimentá-los
Um abismo se abriu entre o sonho e a realidade
Engolindo a verdade

Que eu seja cega para não viver de ilusões
O que foi perdido não voltará
Apenas outro dia deixando tudo para trás

As lágrimas fluirão, mostrando que eu conheci a dor
Nada pode ser esquecido uma vez que foi vivido
Recordações vivendo em um vazio
Flutuando até minha mente
Sete sonhos eu vivi
Por sete noites eu morri
A inocência dos insanos
Doce pecado servido em bandejas de prata
Prêmio de consolação dos derrotados

Traga mais um copo do meu sangue para a mesa
Ofereça um brinde por aqueles que nunca se foram
Celebre enquanto eu estou de joelhos
Eu não sou mais vítima de mim mesma
A criatura selvagem foi solta para mostrar sua real face
E ser domada pelo que restou de mim

As lágrimas fluirão, mostrando que eu conheci a dor
Nada pode ser esquecido uma vez que foi vivido
Recordações vivendo em um vazio
Flutuando até minha mente
Sete sonhos eu vivi
Por sete noites eu morri
A inocência dos insanos
Doce pecado servido em bandejas de prata
Prêmio de consolação dos derrotados

Chegou a hora de aprisionar o que ainda existe
Partir o crucifixo ao meio antes que cada seta siga seu caminho
Somente sangrando eu lembrarei do valor da dor
Permita-me alimentar as memórias
Mas impeça-me de criar novas
O último desejo de quem escolheu não sucumbir
Mais um dia respirando em vão
Porque eu não quero descobrir uma razão

Que eu seja cega para não viver de ilusões
O que foi perdido não voltará
Apenas outro dia deixando tudo para trás

Assista
Um novo reinado para ninguém
Minha mente governando
A cada passo a força cresce
Sonhar é um pesadelo
Resista
A destruição virá com o tempo
Mas sempre restam ruínas
Fortes o suficiente
Impedindo que cada linha se torne a última

As lágrimas fluirão, mostrando que eu conheci a dor
Nada pode ser esquecido uma vez que foi vivido
Recordações vivendo em um vazio
Flutuando até minha mente
Sete sonhos eu vivi
Por sete noites eu morri
A inocência dos insanos
Doce pecado servido em bandejas de prata
Prêmio de consolação dos derrotados

Ainda há uma taça com meu sangue sobre a mesa...

Algum caco do espelho deveria restar

Comentários de sempre: Nem sei se sai ou não do propósito inicial deste blog, talvez eu já tenha saído a algum tempinho e nem tenha notado... bom este texto (sim texto, porque EU não vi poesia nenhuma nele) me surgiu quase pronto quando eu mais uma vez pensava em entrar em hiatus e dar uma abandonada nisso tudo aqui. Uma coisa eu posso garantir: nem tudo é o que parece. Algumas linhas podem conter simbolismos pessoais criados nos últimos dias, sendo assim acredito que a única pessoa que interpretaria totalmente de forma correta cada linha seria eu mesma...mas divirtam-se tentando descobrir o que diabos eu quis dizer dessa vez =)


Algum caco do espelho deveria restar

Que palavras são essas que percorrem minha mente?
Esse súbito aprendizado me mostrando uma estranha felicidade
Eu finalmente achei o meu lugar
Só me resta saber o que fazer quando estiver nele

Eu posso estar sozinha
Posso sangrar por uma dor que já se tornou inexistente
Hoje eu me tornei forte o suficiente para aguentar tudo isso
E eu quero carregar esse meu mundo nas costas
Sozinha

Lágrimas caíram pelo simples fato de eu estar aqui parada
Não acreditando que este tempo todo eu sempre estive no meu devido lugar

Muitas coisas mudaram mas eu ainda sou a mesma
Um grande buraco se abriu aos meus pés
Mas eu salvei o que era necessário
Espero que a escuridão renasça e sepulte o que ficou para trás

E eu vou estar sozinha
Lidando diariamente com o que mais me envenena
Mas eu sinto como se isso não fosse mais um fardo
Minha mente esquartejou o meu destino

E eu vou estar sozinha
Enfim, algum caco do espelho deveria restar...

Almost Broken

I fell so weak
All my energy was stolen
I cannot breathe
My dream is almost broken

I know I should try to write something
But I don't have words anymore
And sometimes I wish I could trow away everything

I wished for so long have strength to carry on
But now all I wish is could fall
I don't want to climb this wall

I fell so weak
All my energy was stolen
I cannot breathe
My dream is almost broken

The perfect disease
Just a way to try to make it easy

These chains aren't just a part of my symbolic game
They are just a way to remember myself that I ain't the same
And they will make me never forget the blame

Break me
Sweet misery
Come to me
The deepest agony

Redeem me
Old prophecy
Forgive me
My impossible fantasy

I fell so weak
All my energy was stolen
I cannot breathe
My dream is almost broken

The perfect disease
Just a way to try to make it easy

Unconditional

Comentário (isso já tá virando rotina): Sinceramente eu fiquei um certo tempo me questionando se deveria ou não postar isso aqui ...Primeiramente porque eu definiria esse poema/texto como um pote de açúcar, assim que eu terminei percebi que o resultado me soou doce demais. Em segundo lugar, acabei não indo muito com a cara dele (talvez pela ausência de rimas, ou talvez por cisma mesmo...) Mas depois de uma grande degladiação com o pote de açúcar, resolvi colocá-lo aqui...


Unconditional

Don't matter how many people I will have to make fall down
Even I keep being a intruder this is the place I chose
Don't matter if I will be happy or not
I still will be here when no one remains

I just spend my time thinking how much unconditional it could be

Don't matter if I will need to wait forever
And how much I will bleed seeing the time passing by me
Don't matter how many wounds I will must stand
I will be here doing the same things

I just spend my time thinking how much unconditional it could be

Don't matter how much vunerable I will show myself
'Cause I forbad myself to fake even a smile
Don't matter how much my fight is in vain
I won't leave it once I have started it

I just spend my time thinking how much unconditional it could be

Don't matter how many times I will feed on myself
'Cause I know that it's all I have now
Don't matter how many times I will see the angry consuming my soul
I still be dreaming with my broken desires

I just spend my time thinking how much unconditional it could be

Don't matter how far I can go
I will always find a way to keep myself near
Don't matter how much it all can change me
I will find a way to stand it

I just spend my time thinking how much unconditional it could be
And I have my whole life...

24 hours

In 24 hours I wished to die
But some minutes after I wished to keep alive
I thought I was seeing the end laughing of my face
I almost cried, thinking I was losing my place

And I felt the angry growing inside of me
I saw how cruel and cold I could be
Above it all, I saw how much you mean to me

In 24 hours I felt so weak that I couldn't open my eyes
But the truth was that I want to believe that all could be a lie
But now, more than ever I know there's nothing above what I feel
And it's the only thing inside of me that I can say is real

And I felt the angry leaving me
And it makes me think how much guilty I could be
Above it all, I knew this pain could kill me

In 24 hours I was beyond the border of insanity
And my senses told me that I wasn't ready for the reality
But my heart fought to keep beating
To show me how much I was bleeding

And I knew that nothing would change to my way
And I understood that I will live with the pain everyday
Noboby will can take it away
'Cause now it's too late

Postagem dupla: Peças que eu preferia ter perdido/ What do you fear?

*Comentário: Enfim, nem faz tanto tempo que eu posto aqui... cinco dias no máximo, eu tinha planejado por apenas o segundo aqui, mas de última hora me surgiu um texto(o primeiro deste post) que berrou na minha cabeça para ser escrito... a tal ponto de eu ter que colocá-lo aqui, mesmo que ele não se refira (pelo menos não diretamente) ao tema ou a idéia inicial do meu blog. Sendo assim, associações entre os dois textos ficam proibidas (quem sou eu para proibir... quer saber, associem o que quizerem afinal tudo saiu da mesma cabeça ¬¬°). Chega de enrolação, pois este comentário nem deveria estar aqui...


Peças que eu preferia ter perdido

O quanto falsa eu posso ser?
Até onde meus olhos conseguirão mentir?
Quanto tempo eu suportarei atuando?
Eu sei que isso talvez se torne necessário em breve
O quanto eu precisarei me destruir para impedir que muros se ergam?

Eu estou disposta a tudo isso
Pois achei o único obstáculo que pode me parar
Me tornar outra pessoa...
Um longo e doloroso processo
Ao qual eu supostamente deveria me submeter
Mas ao invés disso, apenas uma nova casca surgirá
Um jogo de aparências pode valer mais do que qualquer vitória
O último passo antes de eu me tornar vazia
Não importa, não importa, será que ninguém consegue ver o quanto tudo isso não me importa?

Eles podem tentar dizer
Podem criar um oceano para eu atravessar
Podem tentar me moldar
E tudo que eu farei é fingir
Eu sei que posso fazer isso muito melhor do que um dia eles sonharam
Eu não me importo em quebrar mais um espelho
Contanto que não seja derramado sangue sobre ele
Eu temo isso mais que tudo

Para onde quer que eu fuja, levarei isso comigo
Eu não me importo de me ver cair...
Eu só precisava de uma aprovação
E mais uma vez, eu não terei isso
Sendo assim, nada farei
Apenas deixarei que o oceano criado por eles
Me isole em uma ilha
Eu não sei como eu não pude perceber antes
Como pode tanta burrice habitar um ser humano como eu?

Nunca, eu nunca, nunca mais deixarei que isso aconteça novamente
Eu não preciso de uma segunda chance
Porque eu sou cega a ponto de fazer tudo igual
Em nenhum momento eu fui falsa, em nenhum momento eu me senti estranha
Mas, agora como eu caminharei?
Algumas peças se encaixam
Peças que eu preferia ter perdido

********************************

What do you fear?

Tell me what you fear
I can become your worst enemy and make it desapear
Or I can help you and bring it near

I know you are afraid to lose control
But it just will make your fear grows
Keeping you in a world untrue
Making you think in what you cannot do

I got a tale to tell to you
There's a thing I long overdue
A story about a little child
That cannot find her peace of mind
Trying to hide herself in a little shelter
And find a way to know herself better
She lost everything to learn
That she can have all she yearns

Tell me what you fear
I can become your worst enemy and make it desapear
Or I can help you and bring it near

There is one more thing that I need to tell you
This story supposed to be mine but I never could make it true
'Cause I still have many fears
That don't let me show my tears
I wished I could help you but I can not even help myself

If I could tell you what I fear
Would you be my worst enemy
Or would you come near?
The answer is what I fear